“Do you have any idea how suffocating this is?”
“I’m telling you right now, if you keep this up after we’re married, we’ll end up divorced anyway!”
3
“Don’t bother,” I said, my voice steady. “I don’t need you to marry me.”
In our six years together, he had always been free. When he wanted to drink, I sat quietly beside him, never rushing him. If I wasn’t appropriate for the occasion, I waited for his call to pick him up, then took care of him without complaint when he was drunk. When he wanted to take a trip with his friends, I booked the tickets and planned the itinerary. Even when he offered me his phone to check, I never did.
loved him, and I didn’t want to repeat my mother’s mistake
Chapter 1
08.29
I loved him, and I didn’t want to repeat my mother’s mistake–her suffocating control had driven my father to divorce. I thought I
had maintained a healthy distance in our relationship. Before his “accident,” we were inseparable, still in the honeymoon phase.
But now, I understood. My love was suffocating him. Was that the real reason he was faking this illness, seeking a thrill?
Our eyes met. I saw no trace of affection in his gaze. The accusations on the tip of my tongue died in my throat.
Finn, unsettled by my stare, grabbed a bouquet of lilies from his friend and shoved it into my arms. “Fine. Don’t play the victim after
getting what you wanted. Take the flowers and go.”
He still thought I was the same girl who could be placated with a small gift. He didn’t believe that the woman who swore she would
marry no one but him could ever truly leave.
I handed the flowers back to his friend. “These are for your girlfriend. It’s not appropriate for me to take them.”
“I donated the blood willingly. You really don’t have to sacrifice yourself by marrying me.”
A flicker of panic crossed Finn’s face. Shouldn’t Elvira be ecstatic? Why is she insisting I don’t have to marry her? Is she actually mad this time?
Anxiety flashed in his eyes. “Elvira, I…”
الله
His friends started coughing pointedly. He quickly corrected himself. “Elvira, I’m a man of my word.”
I just smiled. “You should go be with your girlfriend. I’m checking out now.”
My generosity seemed to unnerve him further. He felt something was very different about me today, but he couldn’t pinpoint what.
His friends, seeing his hesitation, slapped him on the back and dragged him away.
“Come on, man, stop staring. Your Lara will get jealous! It’s just the usual drama–first the pity play, now playing hard to get. Same
old female tricks. You’re too naive, easy to manipulate.”
“Seriously! Look what you did, man. You’re not a teenager anymore. How did you manage to cause her to hemorrhage? Luckily, Lara ‘s understanding and doesn’t hold it against you, unlike some people who demand marriage just for donating a little blood…”
Their words, intentionally loud enough for me to hear, didn’t cause the expected pain. I just felt cold, a chill that settled deep in my marrow, a cold that even the bright sunlight couldn’t warm.
I watched them leave and then discharged myself.
While Finn was away, I hired a cleaning service to help me pack. The woman looked at the beautifully decorated apartment, ready for newlyweds, and hesitated.
“Miss, all this wedding stuff is brand new. Are you sure you want to throw it away?”
“Yes,” I said. “The groom died. We won’t be needing it.”
She immediately apologized and consoled me. Afraid of triggering me, she started by packing away the wedding photos and doze- ns of photo albums first.
In just half a day, the home I had so carefully decorated lost all its warmth and joy. A cold house for a cold heart.
The cleaner looked at the dozen bags filled with symbols of our love, shaking her head with a sigh. “Miss, you have to look forward.”
