As I waited for the elevator, I thought to myself, I don’t want anything else. I would give up everything, as long as my child is safe,
healthy, and happy.
But when I reached the hospital room, just as I was about to push the door open, I heard Rosalie’s voice from inside. “Oh no, oh no, Leg, I’m so sorry! I’m terrible at taking care of kids. Not only did I let you get sick, but I just ordered a ton of spicy food out of habit.
You just finished your IV, how can you eat this?”
Leo’s voice, small and weak, replied, “It’s okay, Auntie Rosalie. My dad said he’d bring Mom back. This kind of stuff isn’t for you
anyway. Once she’s here, she can do it.”
“Don’t be sad,” he added. “Just having you here with me makes me really happy.”
Leo’s words were a dagger, carving away at my flesh, piece by bloody piece.
1045
Chapter 2
I swayed on my feet, nearly collapsing. It felt as though a bucket of ice water had been dumped over my head.
The frantic, desperate need to see my son cooled, then froze solid.
My heart stopped beating.
A tear splashed onto the back of my hand, so hot it felt like a burn.
David stepped out of the elevator.
10.45
I hastily wiped my eyes and turned away, not wanting him to see me in such a a state. He wouldn’t care. Any love that might have existed between us had been eroded away by years of neglect.
I heard him answer his phone. “Elara can’t stand being away from the kid,” he was saying. “She couldn’t stay away.”
There was a pause. I couldn’t hear the other side.
Then David’s voice, cool and detached, tinged with a chilling indifference: “My wife doesn’t need to be perfect or brilliant. I just need her to take care of the family, to take care of me and our son. Who that person is… does it really matter?”
14
I went back to Ardencroft.
David, surprised not to find me in the hospital room, called me again.
“Elara!”
He practically bit my name out. It was his tell, the sign he was about to lose his temper.
”
Conso
wa
ex
N
M
ww
In the past, his anger would have sent me
into a
panic. I would have desperately tried to figure out what I’d done wrong and scram-
bled to fix it.
But this time, I just stood outside the dessert shop, thinking about the past month.
The truth was, I hadn’t been able to let go.
A marriage isn’t a fling. You can’t just walk away clean.
I had tried. I tried to leave, to do things myself, to stop my world from revolving around David and Leo.
But it hadn’t worked.
I cried myself to sleep at night. In any quiet mome
plagued by self–doubt.
I tormented myself daily, asking why my own son didn’t want me. Why, after giving them everything, I hadn’t received even a shred
of affection, or even basic respect.
I couldn’t let go.
I truly couldn’t.
But the things you can’t let go of have a way of growing thorns, piercing you until you’re covered in wounds.
My hysterics, my quiet withdrawal–nothing had ever caused even a ripple in their hearts.
The hopelessness of it all was crushing.
“David,” I said, after a long pause, my voice steady. “Let’s get a divorce.”
I wanted to try, just once, to love myself properly.
10.45
Chapter 2
I wanted to see if letting go of what I couldn’t hold, just letting it all turn to dust, would finally make me feel better.
15
With Sadie’s help, the divorce papers were sent to David three days later.
He had just left the house, carrying a change of clothes to go stay with Leo at the hospital.
The papers were delivered to him on the street, out of the blue.
He tore open the package.
10.45
He’d been working overtime for days, then going straight to the hospital. He hadn’t been eating or sleeping properly. There were dark circles under his eyes.
The house behind him was a mess.
Staring at the divorce papers, a vein throbbed in his temple.
He rubbed his forehead, exhausted.
Why divorce?
He didn’t understand. It felt absurd.
Just as absurd as when the neighbor had come by to collect the potted plants.
How could Elara give away her plants?
She had nurtured them so carefully. She always got so angry when he or Leo mistreated them.
She couldn’t possibly want to give them away.
She was just sulking.
She loved those plants.
Just like she loved him and their son.
She would never leave them.
But…
She really had.
કલાપીને આપવામાં અને તેની
મણકો તેમના વિસ્તરણ ક
ingr
Her name, Elara, was signed neatly on the papers. The strokes were clean, decisive.
Like her resolve to be rid of them.
She truly didn’t want them anymore.
As easily as she had discarded the plants she had once cherished.
Just like that. Gone.
