Chapter 11
River finally went back to America.
But soon after, Serena called me. “Willa, what the hell did you say to River? He came back and locked himself in his room–hasn’t eaten or drunk anything for three days. Are you trying to kill him?”
“If he dies, he dies. Nothing to do with me.”
With that, I hung up right away.
Soon after, my dad called. “Come back home. For Mrs. Kingsley’s sake.”
I took a deep breath and booked a flight back home.
As soon as I got off the plane, I rushed straight to the Kingsley house.
Serena opened the door–she’d lost her usual confidence and arrogance.
Instead, she looked at me with resentment. “Happy now that it’s come to this? River hates me, the Kingsleys don’t want me around. Willa, I don’t get it–what makes you better than me?”
I didn’t say anything, just walked past her straight to River’s room.
“River, open up.“.
River opened the door immediately and hugged me tight.
“Willa, you came back? Don’t leave again, okay?”
“River, why don’t you get it? We’re impossible now.”
Serena laughed coldly from the side. “If you know it’s impossible, you should disappear completely. A decent ex should be like they’re dead.”
River roared, “Shut the fuck up!”
Serena lifted her chin stubbornly, “River, do you remember what you said? You said you’d take responsibility for me. So what the hell is this?”
-River buried his face in my shoulder, sobering:
“Stop talking, just stop, okay? Willa, I didn’t want to. I never thought about having anything with her. I never liked her–I really only took care of her like she was my sister–in–law.”
“Willa, I was wrong. I shouldn’t have been so confident, so sure you’d never leave me no matter what. I shouldn’t have ditched you over and over because of some promise I made to my brother. And I definitely shouldn’t have gotten so pissed seeing you with another guy that I did something stupid without even figuring out what was going on first, ruining any chance we had. I was wrong–so fucking wrong!”
I pushed him away. “River, I don’t care what happened between you two. The point is, I’m exhausted. You know I didn’t come back because of you–I came back for Mrs. Kingsley. So, don’t put me in an awkward position, okay?”
River leaned against the doorframe, his body slowly sliding down.
I pulled out a stack of photos from my bag–all taken during my time abroad.
Classes, work, socializing, traveling…
I crouched down and showed them to him one by one. “River, I really love my life now. These past months I’ve felt a freedom I’ve never experienced
before. I don’t have to worry about people not liking me, don’t have to worry about you leaving me, don’t have to worry about people abandoning me. I’m not suspicious, sensitive, or insecure anymore. River, you should be happy for me. I’ve grown up, haven’t I?”
River smiled bitterly. “Yeah, Willa finally grew up. She doesn’t throw little girl tantrums anymore like she used to. I’m the one who lost that temperamental, clumsy girl.”
I stood up. “River, I’m leaving.”
River looked down, his voice shaking. “Okay.”
