Chapter 4
Instead, he’d judge me with the harshest prejudice, nailing me to the pillar of shame again and again.
I curled my lips into a cold smile, mimicking his usual expression.-
“Mom and Dad are too busy to look after me. Guess who taught me all this?”
“Of course it was you, dear brother.”
In my previous life, I’d always been both afraid of Daniel and desperate for his approval.
He was several years older than me, always looming as an imposing figure in my life. When we were kids, with our parents constantly tied up at the company, it was Daniel who was left in charge of me.”
If I made even the slightest mistake, he’d smack my hands with a ruler or punish me by withholding meals.}
Once, I brought home a curly stray puppy I’d found in the park. Daniel ordered the housekeeper not to let me in:
“That filthy mutt isn’t welcome here.”
So I sat outside on the front steps all night, clutching the trembling puppy, not knowing what to do.
Back then, I was just a child. I thought that was simply who he was–incapable of the gentle affection other brothers showed their little sisters.
Then Julie appeared.
And I realized.
My brother was perfectly capable of being kind. He just saved all that softness for someone else.
I’d seen him sitting in the car, handing Julie a mug of hot milk, ruffling her hair as he said, “You have to remember to eat three meals a day. If you ever run short, you can always count on me.”
I’d watched Julie scoop up a frail stray kitten on a rainy afternoon, while Daniel shielded her with an umbrella, asking quietly, “Do you want to keep it?”
When Julie got drunk and clung to his shirt, mumbling nonsense, he’d listen patiently, his eyes gentle and calm.
All my life, I’d been trapped in a web of longing–wondering why my brother didn’t love me, why my fiancé never took my side.
Only after living through it all again did I finally understand: I was my own person. My life didn’t depend on someone else’s affection. Love or not, I could survive.
That birthday party never did reach a happy ending.
While I stood my ground, facing off with Daniel, our parents finally returned.
They thanked the guests with polite smiles, ushering them out as quickly as possible.
Julie, ever the performer, tried to play the victim again in front of my mother. But Mom just smiled thinly and cut her off: “Sorry, dear. Whatever happens in the Gardner family, we’ll handle ourselves. I think it’s time for
you
to
go home.”
Julie faltered, her eyes brimming with unshed tears as she looked at Daniel, but eventually, she turned and left. When it was just Daniel and me in the living room, Dad finally spoke, his voice stern:
“All right, let’s hear what happened.“%
Before Daniel could open his mouth, I jumped in..
“A new transfer student arrived at school a while ago. On her first day, she dumped water over her own head and insisted I did it–accused me of bullying.”
“It was only later that I learned she’s the underprivileged student you’ve been sponsoring all along, Julie.”
Daniel, sitting rigidly on the sofa, jerked his head up to stare at me, eyes wide with shock.
Surprised, aren’t you, brother? I found out about your little secret much sooner than you thought.
Pressing my knuckles to my burning eyes, I let my voice tremble:>>
“I don’t really blame her–it’s just a birthday, nothing more.”
“I just… I just wish I understood why you never believe me..,”
Julie’s not the only one who can play the innocent victim in this world.”
With that note of heartbreak in my voice, Dad quickly brought the conversation to a close.
“Enough. I don’t care who started it–there will be no more trouble.”
“If word gets out, it’ll reflect badly on all of you.”
This matter ends here.”
When I got back to school, I stopped hiding my resentment. I bullied Julie openly.
I poured ink into her desk drawer. I laughed loudly whenever her accented English stumbled during recitation.&
I tore up her physics test and let the shreds flutter down onto her head.
“Go on, report me again,” I said with a smile. “That’s your specialty, isn’t it?”
A scrap of paper drifted slowly from her tangled hair.
She looked at me, hatred burning in her eyes.§
But in the end, she only trembled, sobbing as she apologized.
